Not a conscious subject this time- a word to the wise to those who do not read what I write - which is just as well as I write for myself more than anything else.
Why do my boys insist on fighting over anything and everything and at their ages I still have to consistently intervene, which for that matter why am I always the referrer? Why does my son insist on jacking with the radio as soon as we get in the car? Why do they make things as difficult as possible? Why do I eat when I am happy, sad, anxious, mad, bored etc? It is no wonder I have put on the weight I have in the past few years- it is not for any certain reason it is just there...
Why oh why do people insist they want to work and then look at you in aversion when you tell them to do their job as you tired of doing it for them? and why cant' supervisors follow through with actions when they say they are going to?
Why do I feel the need to get my household in order by any means necessary including cutting off all ties from friends and family and isolating us to where there are no outside influences in our bubble to fix what ever is wrong with my child that makes him so combative?
Why must certain people call you and then lie to you? Why is there such a thing as dead beat dads? Why does the Child Support system consistently fail?
Why is there never enough time in the day? And why am I on here when I should be doing any number of things including studying for the test on Saturday that I am going to bomb... Why are there letters AND numbers in Math? English I am great, I might not write fantastically but since this is freehand (typing) and I am really the only one who reads it - what does it matter???
Why do your best friends in the world have the power to hurt and maim more than anyone else and not realize they do it? And why has the most rousing game of phone tag been playing since Monday ? So far I am winning by the way!
Why do people feel the need to pass judgment when they don't walk in your shoes and deal with everything on a daily basis, they only see a snapshot and then make decisions off of that ?
Why do I always have to be the one in charge? Why do I have to make all the hard decisions? I don't want to be the mediator, the peace maker and the one to blame when it all goes South quickly?
And why oh why do the people who are supposed to love you unconditionally not ever love you unconditionally? Why must there always be strings, terms, conditions, and if you F it all up the devil to pay later, I want a do over...
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Saturday, May 8, 2010
School's Out
It finally hit me- this is my baby's last year of Elementary School and Blake is going to be in High School next year - Holy crap!
This year has been a revelation for us with school- First of all Elijah's teachers have finally realized that he is BORED! Yes he is that is why he acts up and is loud etc, so instead of getting himself into trouble he landed in the PACE program, which is our Gifted and Talented. How he managed this I don't know- he didn't get it from me and if he got it from the dark side I am impressed. The biggest problem we have had is keeping him from reading during other classes- that is such an improvement! and He loves his art teacher! She is amazing and really channels his energy in that class and thinks the world of him! With all of that said I have an incredible connection with his teachers and I am really going to miss them next year when his teachers only have him for an 1 hr and then he goes to someone else- I worry it is so easy to get lost in the shuffle.
Blake has had his struggles this year most of it is being a 15 yr old boy, that is too be expected, but he seems to honestly be getting it now. Next year will be a challenge for him as it will be a new school and new friends and learning his teachers all over again but I am confident that he will pull it off. He is still active in choir and art and will be working on his pin-striping this summer with the kit Dad got him for his birthday.
So... we are going to be busy this summer, first the move to the new house, then Blake will be working most of the summer for his Aunt and for his grandfather, Elijah will be going to a friends house so that he is kept busy and not eating Cheetos playing x box all summer, and then we gear up for next year...
This year has been a revelation for us with school- First of all Elijah's teachers have finally realized that he is BORED! Yes he is that is why he acts up and is loud etc, so instead of getting himself into trouble he landed in the PACE program, which is our Gifted and Talented. How he managed this I don't know- he didn't get it from me and if he got it from the dark side I am impressed. The biggest problem we have had is keeping him from reading during other classes- that is such an improvement! and He loves his art teacher! She is amazing and really channels his energy in that class and thinks the world of him! With all of that said I have an incredible connection with his teachers and I am really going to miss them next year when his teachers only have him for an 1 hr and then he goes to someone else- I worry it is so easy to get lost in the shuffle.
Blake has had his struggles this year most of it is being a 15 yr old boy, that is too be expected, but he seems to honestly be getting it now. Next year will be a challenge for him as it will be a new school and new friends and learning his teachers all over again but I am confident that he will pull it off. He is still active in choir and art and will be working on his pin-striping this summer with the kit Dad got him for his birthday.
So... we are going to be busy this summer, first the move to the new house, then Blake will be working most of the summer for his Aunt and for his grandfather, Elijah will be going to a friends house so that he is kept busy and not eating Cheetos playing x box all summer, and then we gear up for next year...
Thursday, April 15, 2010
One of these is not like the other
It has always boggled my mind how two children raised in the same house with the same rules, parents and opportunities can be so exceptionally different.
I have two girlfriends who have younger brothers who prove this without a shadow of a doubt. Both of my friends are hard working, law abiding, religious, family oriented females… Both of their brothers are often in trouble with the law, women, their own mothers, irresponsible and consistently make bad decisions – whether it be smoking potpourri or leaving the scene of an accident they caused. It doesn’t have to be that extreme there are brothers who work with me that one is highly intelligent and fluent in Spanish and English, while his brother is not fluent in English at all and requires constant supervision.
With all of this being said and if you are wondering I do have a point- how does this transfer to my boys? The oldest is now 15 and it has been a wild ride up to this point. He is sarcastic, more attitude that you can think one person can have, definitely a member of the ‘entitled generation’ and is solely out for number 1. He has no interest in school, groups, and sports, anything that remotely involves anything we suggest and yet turns around and says we do not offer anything to him that he wants to do. Now keep in mind the child has adamantly stated he doesn’t want to go to Orlando in July, for vacation- why because he doesn’t want to fly. That is the only reason. Now I have done the drive to San Antonio with both of them and it was a whipping so there will be no driving to Orlando.
The youngest is full of energy, caring, wants to be as involved in school as possible has about five different career paths laid out. This is not to say that the oldest doesn’t care about things he does just in his own way. Meaning I have to figure out how to bend it towards him. Sometimes I succeed mostly I don’t.
Right now we are learning the consequences at home they have always been there but for some reason they seem to be grasping the concept that I am not playing around. The house is cleaner as they are picking up after themselves, chores are being done more and when they are supposed to be done. Rooms are more picked up than normal. Something that I have said or done somewhere has finally sunk in. Oh wait go back and cross that last line out because I am afraid I just jinxed myself.
I have two girlfriends who have younger brothers who prove this without a shadow of a doubt. Both of my friends are hard working, law abiding, religious, family oriented females… Both of their brothers are often in trouble with the law, women, their own mothers, irresponsible and consistently make bad decisions – whether it be smoking potpourri or leaving the scene of an accident they caused. It doesn’t have to be that extreme there are brothers who work with me that one is highly intelligent and fluent in Spanish and English, while his brother is not fluent in English at all and requires constant supervision.
With all of this being said and if you are wondering I do have a point- how does this transfer to my boys? The oldest is now 15 and it has been a wild ride up to this point. He is sarcastic, more attitude that you can think one person can have, definitely a member of the ‘entitled generation’ and is solely out for number 1. He has no interest in school, groups, and sports, anything that remotely involves anything we suggest and yet turns around and says we do not offer anything to him that he wants to do. Now keep in mind the child has adamantly stated he doesn’t want to go to Orlando in July, for vacation- why because he doesn’t want to fly. That is the only reason. Now I have done the drive to San Antonio with both of them and it was a whipping so there will be no driving to Orlando.
The youngest is full of energy, caring, wants to be as involved in school as possible has about five different career paths laid out. This is not to say that the oldest doesn’t care about things he does just in his own way. Meaning I have to figure out how to bend it towards him. Sometimes I succeed mostly I don’t.
Right now we are learning the consequences at home they have always been there but for some reason they seem to be grasping the concept that I am not playing around. The house is cleaner as they are picking up after themselves, chores are being done more and when they are supposed to be done. Rooms are more picked up than normal. Something that I have said or done somewhere has finally sunk in. Oh wait go back and cross that last line out because I am afraid I just jinxed myself.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
All my Children - sigh...
Well yesterday Jazz decided to take his stupidity to another level. Yes I can say this because A) I live with him and B) he gives new meaning to the word SPECIAL. Shawn was off for the day and I get an email while at work that says:
Jazz is retarded; he popped out the screen upstairs and jumped out, or fell out. Either way, he's ok, and was more than ready to come inside when I realized the screen had been popped out and went looking for him.
So goofball falls out of a second story window and can’t figure out how to get back in? Wow that is classic! I think he knew he was in trouble because he spent all night being very sweet, which is totally out of character for him. I am still in shock that he somehow didn’t take off running since he is my adventurous fuzzy child.
The other fuzzies are just the same as always Simon sleeps the day away and was snoring at me while Shawn was in the bedroom on the phone last night… So not fair since I wanted to go to bed myself but as I had TPC stuff to do could not quite manage it yet and it was also only 8:30. Belle somehow managed again to come into our room without the dynamic duo pouncing on her and she insisted on sleeping on my pillow again. It used to be my two legged children who didn’t sleep at night and now it is the four legged ones…
Jazz is retarded; he popped out the screen upstairs and jumped out, or fell out. Either way, he's ok, and was more than ready to come inside when I realized the screen had been popped out and went looking for him.
So goofball falls out of a second story window and can’t figure out how to get back in? Wow that is classic! I think he knew he was in trouble because he spent all night being very sweet, which is totally out of character for him. I am still in shock that he somehow didn’t take off running since he is my adventurous fuzzy child.
The other fuzzies are just the same as always Simon sleeps the day away and was snoring at me while Shawn was in the bedroom on the phone last night… So not fair since I wanted to go to bed myself but as I had TPC stuff to do could not quite manage it yet and it was also only 8:30. Belle somehow managed again to come into our room without the dynamic duo pouncing on her and she insisted on sleeping on my pillow again. It used to be my two legged children who didn’t sleep at night and now it is the four legged ones…
Saturday, March 27, 2010
And more fun...
Today is our one Year Anniversary! All in all a very good year and I feel blessed everyday. I however thought I was going to spend it lounging around and maybe going to get my toes done, something along those lines.
Not so much I got up this morning went and ran errands, stopped at Starbucks for some much needed coffee, and came home and hit the ground running. So far laundry including rugs is going, E's room is clean and vacuumed (by him we just directed), lunch has been cooked and eaten, and I have been painting thanks to Shawn who goes before me and tapes off because he is so much better at it than I am and I don't have the patience. The boys bathroom is three quarters painted and the window sills in the living room have been painted also. Now I am sitting here trying to figure out if I am out of energy or want to? Not sure gonna finish my tea and think about it...
Not so much I got up this morning went and ran errands, stopped at Starbucks for some much needed coffee, and came home and hit the ground running. So far laundry including rugs is going, E's room is clean and vacuumed (by him we just directed), lunch has been cooked and eaten, and I have been painting thanks to Shawn who goes before me and tapes off because he is so much better at it than I am and I don't have the patience. The boys bathroom is three quarters painted and the window sills in the living room have been painted also. Now I am sitting here trying to figure out if I am out of energy or want to? Not sure gonna finish my tea and think about it...
Monday, March 22, 2010
Since your the man....
I have a longstanding rule in my house- any male type person has to kill the bugs. Whether it be a fly, an ant or a spider I don't kill bugs. Any bugs. In fact my boys have known from an early age if there is a cup overturned on the counter there is a bug under t here and they are to kill it. And you would think with three cats in the house bugs should not be a problem. Not quite, so this morning while in the shower I looked up and to my horror was a HUGE spider! I called Shawn in and he told me to drown it, um no... You are the man you kill the bugs, that is not that much to ask right? Well neither of us are morning people so you can imagine he was thrilled to come and assist me, especially since it was not his day to get up early. However my honey did come in and save the day after informing me that I could have grabbed the sprayer on the shower head and do it myself... No thanks you are the man and bugs are your job...
Sunday, March 14, 2010
The Week in Review
Well we survived the week with Shawn being in South Texas all week, it wasn't fun but we got through it. This week was busy but not busy enough to not get on here, I just could not order my thoughts well enough and I didn't want to whine about being all alone all week.
The boys had a good and bad week, seeing more attitude and trying to get away with things from B now that they have their doors back, but we kind of expected this. E gets his cable back in his room as he got all 80's plus on his report card for this six weeks. Of course we know the girl child got all A's on her report card because that is just what she does. Picked up a littlest Pet shop critter for her yesterday. Not bribery she would do the same with out us doing anything for her.
I had my first actual show this week and got a few bookings out of it so I guess this means that I get to continue doing TPC, which thrills me it is so much fun and I am really enjoying cooking everything and it being new and exciting and quick- and not standing in front of the fridge and the pantry going what is for dinner? Of course if the boys would quit eating everything I bring home I would not spend half as much time at the grocery store!
We picked up the motor and the hoist using my dad's truck yesterday and got it home so with the boys mostly gone for the week as it is Spring break I expect to see Shawn in the garage till it is done. There are worse things.
So I am sure that there are tons more noteworthy things that happened this week but... trying not to write like I talk and go on for miles- have a fantastic week all!
The boys had a good and bad week, seeing more attitude and trying to get away with things from B now that they have their doors back, but we kind of expected this. E gets his cable back in his room as he got all 80's plus on his report card for this six weeks. Of course we know the girl child got all A's on her report card because that is just what she does. Picked up a littlest Pet shop critter for her yesterday. Not bribery she would do the same with out us doing anything for her.
I had my first actual show this week and got a few bookings out of it so I guess this means that I get to continue doing TPC, which thrills me it is so much fun and I am really enjoying cooking everything and it being new and exciting and quick- and not standing in front of the fridge and the pantry going what is for dinner? Of course if the boys would quit eating everything I bring home I would not spend half as much time at the grocery store!
We picked up the motor and the hoist using my dad's truck yesterday and got it home so with the boys mostly gone for the week as it is Spring break I expect to see Shawn in the garage till it is done. There are worse things.
So I am sure that there are tons more noteworthy things that happened this week but... trying not to write like I talk and go on for miles- have a fantastic week all!
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